Wednesday, February 29, 2012

What a week!!!

So I'm sure that everyone is anxiously awaiting the results we got on Tuesday....well, lets just say that as of now, I think I will get to be the designated driver for girl's night for the next several months!  We have more bloodwork Friday and Monday just to make sure everything is moving in the right direction, but I feel very comfortable that all will be good.  That mean ultrasound in just 2 weeks ot see how many are in there....always nerveracking to wait for that!  But for now, I feel good that things are looking good.  Talk about some pressure....I know that it wouldn't be my fault if it didn't work, but I know I would somehow feel like it was, and let me tell you, that's alot of pressure on yourself!!  So, everyone can breathe a sigh of relief for now....and get ready for the roller coaster of pregnancy!!!

On another amazingly happy note, we officially sent in all of our paperwork (and a rather substantial chunck of $$) in to really get our adoption process started.  Deep breath in, deep breath out.....I was shaking the whole time we were signing things and sending them off.  I feel like this is the point of no return in this giant leap....and I can't lie, it's pretty scary, but also pretty awesome at the same time.  It is really feeling like it might really happen now....a year from now we could have a daughter....wow....trying to let that sink in....just wow....so much has to happen before we can get to that point, but I still feel like we are on the track we should be, and it will happen just like it should!!

I had the awesome opportunity this weekend to give news to the parent's that I got a positive home pregnancy test last week (this was before the bloodwork).  As we were talking over Skype, it really hit me that we were so much in a similar place.  They are in this position of being so excited, but also still so nervous becuase so much can still happen and they don't want to let that guard down and get hurt if something does happen.  But at the same time, it really is starting to feel real for them that they may be parents for the first time this year, and it is next to impossible to not be ecstatic when you feel like you are one step closer to that!  I feel much the same way with the adoption.  We are one step closer, and I really do feel like it is going to happen, but I'm still worried that for whatever reason it won't happen and I don't want to get my hopes up too much.  Maybe that is why we get along so well, we can relate to each other so well! 

I still cannot figure out how to put into words how blessed I feel to have so many amazing things in my life.  I told my mom today that I guess I should be stressed with everything going on, but I just don't, and I guess it's because everything going on is so good, and I can't be stressed by that!!!  Family.....good, Friends....good, Surrogacy....good, Adoption....good, School....good (I've gotten to use a speculum for the past two weeks, which is so exciting for a dork like me!) .  It just is amazing how good life can be!!!!

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